AND THEN CAME THE BUS BUS After the fight at the bus stop one believes that the worst has passed. But when you see the driver's face in whose hands you put your life, notes two lumps in your throat that should be more in the crotch. It is estimated that cetaceans do not see a friendly face like a movie that opens the door with a friendly smile, well yes but after that the stick had clavao on the cheek inside and could not shut up. Rather it is a predator's smile, which will thinking "I will draw you a career, or not, someday, but meanwhile I am going to whore to see who falls first." course I would take the bus at the first stop as we entered tighter or less everyone, but as far to the second stop and was full early in the morning. That's when the driver enjoyed: reached the next stop, thousands of expectant people at the stop ready to rise, makes a feint and uyyyyy ! the elusive and flees. people face a poem, tears, insults, despair, resignation, like a movie of Almodóvar but transvestite orphan ... I think. While inside we gave thanks to Maker, in part, by being able to come and go even Hold on to the roof which murciélago.Porque that too was great, when the bus was filled with the driver opened the back door and said " up from behind! " . I have studied the expansion and compression of liquids, solids and gases under different isothermal and isobaric conditions and I must say that the compression from an academic qualification, of bodies in the bus was the host! . How would a girl was reading some stamps on the bus, the output is expanded and results that were the Espasa Encyclopedia , in 15 languages!. If the stop is screwed up were not able to raise the bus watched them with envy, because when the driver closed the doors thought "we Lolo this is like taking a Formula 1, with what you like Alonso !, steps to stop that sure is the same. " Well this attitude in a modern bus is reprehensible, but salvageable. Of course we were traveling in buses that were outdated when Franco made communion. Above many of us were able to give a member, except that you're thinking, not to board a bus twice, if a man of those who had a joint in the center. As our driver the Lolo took the corner as if he were to be fined for slow, those who were at the intersection of two bus watched as the board that connected the two parts of the bus was consists of 2 pieces of hard, so there was not €. In every corner you saw people saying goodbye to the friends who were in another part of the bus if it broke in half, boyfriends delivered love letters, given food parcels and I think I saw some b engala . When one sees how the campus is closer, should be happy right?; Pos no!. Then the fun began and why the pseudonym DRAGON - LAT the bus. Our campus in a gesture of unprecedented road safety and to avoid the typical racing tunning , which were the most normal thing on a campus where the best car was the Seat Panda inherited from the grandfather one, put commonly called the Guards Tumbaos . For anyone who is not familiar with the term, we refer to packages and put on the road pa you know with horns on the roof of the car if you spend more than 12 , 5 km / h fuck you cushions. Man when the car is a leading cuidaico , now when the bus is not yours and you sweat it if you go from being above Ferdinand Alonso be Carlos Sainz it gets better. That
were not boats, noooooo a well earned break in the pole jump at the Olympics, we climbed so much that one day I saw the eyes of a pilot of the Eagle Patrol Montao on his plane. So, follaos by campus to giving the bus, with pockets of death and if you go over with colleagues as the descojone bastards , at that age have no fear of death. People got the bus ticket as if it was the Dragon Kan. The girls were up in groups holding hands and saying " aunt jo that fear! , if I scream hand and take me when we pass by the machine let me know photos to smile" , the uncles "to see who pota first! "," not to release the hands fag! "," I think top 2 times! " . These buses crowded, where you scratch your ear and you realize it's ear next to you and that hand is not even yours and say: "who the fuck my hand is ?!!". Once, and finally, going on a double abarrotao in front carrying a girl petite and each time the driver braked I would head towards it, I thought "other well and braking then throw the girl a corn so great that we think the same for 4 months. " At that time and in the middle of campus direction Murcia, late, the bus stops on the shore and the lights go "is already putearnos after the driver now we viola I told myself. At that moment another similar bus and people desbordao stands parallel to ours. Looking at the next bus was like watching a tin of sardines "I'll have eyes out of their sockets by the pressure like that?" you wonder. At that time our friend Lolo screams "broken sa bus every other!" ; "impossible!" is the cry heard more . After that day I heard that several people traveling on buses began to earn pocket money such as contortionists, I think there are any in the Circo del Sol . Well ladies and dunces hope you liked it, a hug tod @ s and until we read. Signed .: Black- poisoned.
Remembering (not to the memo 2 times) those moments with my Motic Bueno remembered the reason that led my father to buy the bike. Neither me nor to him that I was amused by motorbike, but the events in my first months College took me to meet my Derbi that Satan keep me until I arrive. As every poor college student again and my only option to get on the campus of Espinardo was via LAT-BUS or later we christened DRAGON-LAT. And we want amoeba first time one takes the bus number 39 for the campus is believed to be as in American films: A hat and smiling chauffeur opens the door while in an orderly queue , students laugh, tease, beat the geeks (thank goodness I was a slacker). Then, on a trip in which the captain of the football team flirts with cheerleader, you look at a girl who sits alone and is considered a freak. She looks at you and you find that plucking the eyebrows, combing and gives 974369 miniskirt kicks to the head of the cheerleaders, you fall and you are the kings of the prom ... Or that was in high school?. What was for me the stark reality: You get to the stop 15 minutes before departure time for the bus, you see a group of people forming a riot, not a tail. When you get closer you realize that most are armed, double-edged swords, axes, 2 coats, brass knuckles, dirty diapers, etc ... . Anything goes to make void the curb when the bus pa. As you look you can not distinguish any type or group of students: nerds, athletes, etc ... . If the differences are not their fighting techniques to move to the "tail" - The Van Damme : They are incredibly able to open the legs to cover more space in the queue to enter without strain. Some may open both legs was right where you appears left and think "what have you lost the national ballet." - The Steven Seagal: Those using their abdominal volume, only have one that fills the belly, take advantage of the inertia of the opponent to bounce off him and off balance, are also called the gravitational force and the Death Star . - Hobbits: We all know that Hobbits are masters of subterfuge, as your view will not pa Lante realize that in your legs, there are some things which are not crabs, building tunnels to the bus, sneaking in a group. - Hairs: I put "the" when it should be "the", as most of this group is made up of females and women of the opposite sex as one said. Are these people using his wonderful hair Pantene Pro-V I'm worth Loreal are giving Pelaz in the face to people. So taking advantage of this temporary blindness slip forward positions. - rings run death or mortal potato : Describes the group of people, usually girls, who fused their bodies which Siamese create a sphere of power that moves by turning the bus. Are you aware God do not stand in your way!. Many people have disappeared in those areas and leaving were not the same as Loli Alvarez, Yola Berrocal and Paco Porras. - The Zombies: Those beings in the tail of staring at the front, walking with a slower pace and deadly. Do not know if they breathe, do not know if they think, just know that if you sorberán your brain before you put that tiger nut milk. If you are over straw, spirt wear their hair long and black nails scares you for life. In a future post I will continue telling the adventures that I experienced in the DRAGON-LAT. A hug tod @ s and until we read. Signed
.: Black-poisoned.
Come, come, be keeping the champagne yet I do not recall. Today I want to talk, dear coulrofóbicos of "Bridal showers." Yes hated triscadecafóbicos there are many things which man has an irrational fear, but fear of bridal showers is completely rational and logical. There are a few unwritten laws, or if, on human survival in different environments: 1 - In the sea prevents clean teeth with your fingernails to a white shark that is on a diet of parsley, expandable to white sharks are not dieting. 2 - In the jungle India try not to give him a pinch on the eggs to a tiger that is sleeping, expandable the tigers are awake. 3 - In North America try not to sing "Angelitos negros" of Machin 2 maracas used as live rattlesnakes, expandable to a single rattlesnake . 4 - In any city in the night spots to avoid contact, both verbal and physical, with a group of women ranging from bridal shower, expandable to any area of \u200b\u200bthe city. And exudates testosterone than men with what our state of continuous excitement makes in a natural altered state. But when women go farewell beings become possessed by a strange entity that becomes a cross between a trucker León and Celia . And you will ask yourselves: "How to recognize a bachelorette party? ." Pos mu simple: when you see a group of women with plastic cipotes screaming head with glasses in one hand and a decoy morning on the other has all the earmarks of being a bachelorette. If you are dining at a table and see a group of ladies with Descojonado colored headbands with 2 antennas whose ends are two separate handles, and while one throws a Pichica with legs on the table that goes with the Buela rope with one hand is covered with a napkin while the other throws holy water, which always in your bag, that also has earmarks of being a bachelorette party. How to recognize the bride?: As for the Boy know who is, or the rest of the girls if they caught a pedal in fear to remember who he is, usually takes a band with an unmistakable statement. Farces are often characteristic of a Nobel prize for literature or extracted from any part of the generation of 27 , Rafael Alberti, Federico García Lorca or similar, such as: "On the whore girlfriend" , "Miss Golden potorro" , etc ... And is that a bachelor party is like any guys spree, but a single ... is the jungle!. There you see her aunt and mother of the bride pulling the thong to Boy while Grandma yells "me, me, I am a virgin!" . Eye in any way blame this performance, I think is healthy, except grandma pa which will then upload the tension. But then that same grandmother who has left his dentures in the ass of Boy, disinherit you and cursing you saying you're going to go to hell when you tell that you're going to live with your girlfriend toa life without marrying, but mine ... mine teeth recovered at day 2. Well dear readers, admits any comment about the bridal shower, a hug tod @ s and until we read. Signed
.: Black-poisoned.
FAREWELL THE FUNERAL. REQUIESCANT PACE IN REQUIEM FOR A DERBI If hard was the death of my Derbi , I think that was the height funeral and burial ... to call them in some way. My amos deserved a decent burial of the life he had led, so I looked closer to scrapping my house pa not the beating stick. And I said "post anything online seeking scrapping in Murcia and anything done" , if I know what I hoped had searched for scrapping the cutters Gizzard and not here. After a few seconds I found Scrap the Palm , cojo, my bike sleeping for eternity under a palm tree, which bonico, I did not know was that the palm was in Sidi Ifni . Step telephone. No problem, was to provide documentation, knocked down and picked her up in my house. Great, but what fucking pa was the Derbi and how easy it was to be buried ...¡¡ me innocent!. My sentence began the moment I said "post anything we find where the dismantling and approach" ...¡¡¡¡ me shit on the google map and the bastard who invented it !!!!. I look and I get the URL for the dismantling and flechica on the map: Juan Carlos I, along with Funeral and dealers. Well, I have the car as well aparcao, we will make spending and I ride the tram that leaves me in the door. I wear the tracksuit, I get the wireless headphones and my gig of memory with music jevi and wing walking!. Well I get to Round in 10 minutes, well, well at 12 in the safe dismantling ...¡¡ success unless Paco Porras with a sprig of celery in the asshole!. I ride the tram, not for nothing but at 20 km / h when the tram arrives at the University of Espinardo the university come with their children's hands. I already see colleagues at the stop "shit tram escapao me!, Well I walk towards me and came before me on time though!" Poof, I walk the other day I got 30 minutes before I had time to go to class and all ". Pos nothing as the tram approaches the stop next to where the shit ... the google map told me I was scrapping Granada Lane , I'll start posting and mosques "not if I blow my sounded no scrapping, but I do not see anythin like it, so is the Mercedes dealership that due to the crisis accept what is." Well post let's take a walk, pick up the Path of Granada Churra address and my tune after we pull. 12:30 am in hot weather and I MC with long sleeves and continue walking. And will shortly, I innocently, as I post more than 20 minutes walk Murcia to go I do not have. After for a while there comes a point where I looked behind pa "is the same distance from here to the tram to my house" . 7687 days wore on foot, had dao 3 turns to the gig of music, I knew the lyrics to every song, sheet music and the beat. I was about to dehydration, did not see in the arcades but old thatched huts in which some black with topless and a plate in his mouth crushed worms appetizer pal "pa mi I walk more than necessary ". After asking in Swahili several villagers cursed the direction of dismantling got to see on the horizon, is it a mirage?, no, it's true!, I finally remembered the bike, google map and the mother who bore them both two. Two planes, 4 trains and three sad tigers after I got home. My mother crying and calling the police to cancel the search appliance, my father went down to remove the pictures of me hit on the lampposts in which they are pulling me a booger, my grandmother throwing holy water on the neck, it took us 2 hours to convince that it was a ghost that came to fetch the last day of his life. same day I was called to pick up the bike, while the load on the crane went through my mind all these "good" times we had spent together, when each time the rain picked up. I remember when I bought the raincoat and pants for the rainy days, I was more cool than an eight, but the road to college thought "I'm noticing a little chilly in the package, it's raining clear as fresh water is me freezing the unspeakable ". When I got to campus and took off my windbreaker pants saw the seam of the water brewing shit was getting rained on the package. Take!, Wet up that I seem to have MEAO, Professor at me approached me and whispered "I know it sounds hard but not to piss up" . That time of pride left I said "this bike the grave I do for my balls!" and tomb, the tomb while the pedal, an element not calculated in the grave, touched the ground and went to hell, and I did not fall!. JODI was hard. also remembered many other good things, and with a tear about to leave I left my dear Derbi while the crane had, certainly in hell of motorcycles, it was jevi , you will step on the tail 3 times Satan and at least. REQUIESCANT IN PACE. A hug tod @ s and until we read. Signed
.: Black-poisoned.
"When I took the motorcycle that afternoon did not know it was the last time I drove ...". could start like this post, but I will not do it, do not want to mourn and dear neighbors is 5, sniff, snif my Derbi Variant Start Classic 600, 600,000 km, is dead!. Ora pro nobis . Now that did die with two balls: Saturday night, half past one, 2 miles from my house, dark road surrounded by garden. And thinking I get home, put on my pajamas and sleep. When at one point the bike gives me and I coughed "as I leave here in the middle Tirao I swear I'll turn into a park swing!". While I'm giving pa wallets that stand in the middle of the road I see a light at the horizon. Lord blessed if when you get turns green you build another cathedral in Murcia and Christianize all the Moors who live in San Andrés ! . Have you seen any new cathedral in Murcia ?, Because then you know what happened. There is a very stressful situation in Formula 1 and is the pit stop in 10 seconds they change the wheels and you fill the tank. Well, my situation was more stressful, the bike was for standing as he thought "as I stand here change the wheels for 2 bricks, and I fill the gas tank but the hosts face pa take my money because what's the fucking bike ... ". But my Derbi was strong, but strong bastard. gotta get home and when I parked I saw the agony on his handlebars, that and a pigeon shit, "And then I understood why she cries, and then I understood why it kills. ..!". "I'll take to fix" , I thought at the time, how wrong I was!. spent a year and accepted reality, Derbi had died. There are 2 things that remind me of my classmates: 1 - A backpack was my pa books Marlboro bright red that my father gave me the strength of their lungs, which God the rest his soul. 2 - And my Derbi Variant and "purr" of the engine that warned all and sundry that Black-poisoned arrived at the school. addition
saying it was a bitch the Derbi not talk. He was unique in that 4 out of 6 times the rain picked up. Yes ladies and horses, and could be full of June 46 º C in the shade that if I had to go to campus to take only one class on Friday early morning, early start included going and began to rain. And I could have got a bonus with the rain. It could have gone to talk to the mayor and tell "I have a foolproof method pa rain, for 500 euros a month I guarantee rain until at the most raw of the drought, you just call me and tell me you need to be urgently on the bike somewhere and take in the rain. " is what I am seeing, with speakers on the handlebars, such as sharpening or advertising in the villages who has dead "Alcabajillo neighbors died Petunio Sánchez, better known as the Corville , the Mass will be held ..." , but I would say "fellow citizens have come to the neighborhood LLOVEDOR , pick up your clothes tended lady, do not wash your car today, sir, or scrub the windows and prepérense morning to catch snails! ". And so ends the story of the death of a myth, another day I will write about the funeral. That hell keep it warm, safe and has come up to rain, lol. Greetings to everyone
s and until we read. Signed
.: Black-poisoned.
